The Imposter Syndrome

More
4 years 11 months ago #2781 by Serenity
Do you ever feel like an imposter? Like you are Fake , or think people will find out that you are Fake ?
When i was talking to a friend the other day i told her that one day Clint and Brenna would visit me and i will meet Opie in june in Barcelona and that he would see right through me and that that kind of scared me and i could not put into words why . When we started going deeper into the conversation i kind of admitted that i was afraid that they would find out what a fraud i am , how they would see that i am not as wonderful as everyone thinks i am , that i have aches , and longings and a deep rooted longing to always to do more than humanly possible.
My friend smiled at me and ensured me that was not even the half of it haha

She called me a perfectionist , self castiding , self loathing , hot mess sometimes and made it hard for others to follow what i was really about. The conclusion was that i think i am never enough, that i will never do and that the way i am trying to improve myself sometimes work against me , and thus i fail , like every other human being.

I feel better no i can name my feelings , the imposter syndrome , it makes clear how i struggle and why. Its time to try stuff that i am not good at , just because i can , just because failure is imminent and part of growing. Time to stop pushing people and emotions away because of lack of self love and fear of discovery.
Its funny how this ties in a little with the post about Self Improvement aswell ..
Ow and about that Imposter Syndrome
www.themuse.com/advice/5-different-types...s-to-battle-each-one
The following user(s) said Thank You: Wescli Wardest, jzen, Brenna

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
4 years 11 months ago - 4 years 11 months ago #2782 by Acanthos
Replied by Acanthos on topic The Imposter Syndrome
Used to be a 3 as an adolescent and it was no problem, until I lost the ability to focus on anything other then the ladies.... then it became a problem because I stopped delivering. But it didn't bring me down - rather got buried down deep as social anxiety. For I wasn't me, and so I didn't want to be fake and pretend to be me or pretend to be someone else. In a way it was like losing oneself. You start again not on the same path, but on a path you can actually make steps forward on.

極代 ~ per ardua ad astra
Last edit: 4 years 11 months ago by Acanthos.
The following user(s) said Thank You: Wescli Wardest, jzen, Serenity

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
4 years 11 months ago #2783 by Serenity
Replied by Serenity on topic The Imposter Syndrome

You start again not on the same path, but on a path you can actually make steps forward on.


Nice , yeah this needs to sink in , i think its very hard to just stop and change what you are used to , but its true Acanthos , many people make the same mistakes , expecting different outcomes. You know the funny thing is , sometimes it feels you are on a path of pain and failure when in reality you are finally moving forward ;)
And i recognize not wanting to be a phoney , but who are we then? Something we spend our lives on finding out !
The following user(s) said Thank You: Wescli Wardest, Acanthos

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
4 years 10 months ago #2784 by Wescli Wardest

I feel like an imposter all the time! :ohmy:

Sometimes, when I think back to who I used to be, I know I am not that person anymore. And I think about who I want to be, or who I try to be every day, I know I am not that person either.

Right now, I guess I just am who I am. But in all honesty, I am not all that sure who that person is… which feels like being an imposter in itself! LOL :lol:

I have been chalking it up to I am not finished my journey to where ever I’m going and so I really can’t be that person yet. So trying to define or describe or live up to or whatever, that person is… is just not realistic. :unsure:

On the other side, I am comfortable with who I am right now. But I’m not always sure exactly “who” that is. I know… confusing LOL :lol:

The following user(s) said Thank You: Serenity

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
4 years 10 months ago #2785 by Serenity
Replied by Serenity on topic The Imposter Syndrome

On the other side, I am comfortable with who I am right now. But I’m not always sure exactly “who” that is. I know… confusing LOL :lol:



That is a good point really , i have been focussing so much lately on what i do that i kind of lost track of who i am and sometimes to the point where i feel it does not matter who i am because somehow my actions will determine more who i am than words ever will. But having said that , i would like to know who i am in order to find out how to do more...
Also very often i am not comfortable with who i am , but that is because i often just dont do what i am supposed to do :lol:

Ah well gotta start somewhere right ?
The following user(s) said Thank You: Wescli Wardest

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

  • Lykeios
  • Visitor
  • Visitor
4 years 10 months ago #2786 by Lykeios
Replied by Lykeios on topic The Imposter Syndrome
I get this sometimes. Especially in the Jedi community and at work. I look around and go "who is trusting me to manage these people?" :lol:

But generally speaking, I am happy with who I am as a person. There are still many things I need to work on, some rough edges to sand off and such, but that could be said for anyone I'm sure. I do my best to work day by day to do better than the day before and that's enough for me.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
4 years 10 months ago - 4 years 10 months ago #2806 by Brenna
Replied by Brenna on topic The Imposter Syndrome
Oh my goodness this.

From a professional perspective, having worked with soooooo many people in a coaching capacity... Everyone. Literally EVERYONE goes through that. (unless you have one or two psychological disorders, but thats a whole other conversation) Absolutely everyone experiences impostor syndrome at one time or another and studies have shown that the more capable and successful you are, the more likely you are to feel like an impostor!

On a personal level. It happens a lot. I regularly look around me and go "I do not know what I am doing here or who put me in charge of any of this!" And it can be very overwhelming. Sometimes I find myself feeling crushed by the weight of that feeling and the surety that any moment now someones going to realize I have no idea what i'm doing and that I'm going to be in trouble :dry:

It really just requires constant vigilance and self awareness. I find that having conversations with the "Impostor" helps. But I dont always manage to keep it at bay and those days are hard hard work.


PS - Wes and I are probably the most straight forward people you'll ever meet. If we thought you were a fake, we wouldn't be talking to you :D
Last edit: 4 years 10 months ago by Brenna.
The following user(s) said Thank You: Wescli Wardest, Serenity

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
4 years 10 months ago #2824 by Rosalyn J
Replied by Rosalyn J on topic The Imposter Syndrome
Jesus I thought it was just me. Thank you Serenity for the resource. I find myself a #1. It is really hard to delegate for me, and thatbis a lesson I am learning right now. Its probably something I'll need to relearn too, but I have good role models in my church and in the Community.
I think the reason why it is so difficult for me is that I haven't exactly been given the best hand in life, so I am just waiting for someone to say, "well, you know, we ought to give her some slack since she's disabled or black or a woman" or equally bad "you know she only got that because of being (insert thing) and so it can be really hard to trust my own merit or to take compliments...and, I guess, also that I want all the glory when things go right.
The following user(s) said Thank You: Wescli Wardest, Serenity

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

Time to create page: 0.423 seconds
Powered by Kunena Forum